I’m a veterinarian who works at a small pet hospital. I love working with the animals; it’s the people I have a problem with, specifically my manager. He leaves me out of important meetings, looks away when I’m speaking to him, and ignores my suggestions. He doesn’t treat everyone else very well either, but he treats me even worse. I don’t know what I did to make him angry. I was hired by the director of the clinic and get along well with him and my co-workers.
Sincerely,
Excluded and Ignored
Dear Excluded,
You say that you don’t know what you did to make him angry and also that he doesn’t treat everyone else very well either. It sounds like you’re working with an inexperienced manager who doesn’t want to deal with the people part of his job. It’s always a pity when a person who doesn’t care to lead and develop people becomes a manager. However, there’s no more time for a pity party. If you want to stay at this hospital, you need to change your relationship with this manager.
There’s no time for a pity party.
People like people who like them. If you and your manager don’t get along, everything is going to be more difficult at work. Set up a meeting to build up the relationship with your manager. Let your manager know that you feel as if you two have started out on the wrong foot and would like to improve the relationship. If he acts as if he doesn’t know what you’re talking about, share specific examples with him. Don’t attack or blame him during this meeting. Show an interest in getting to know him better. Ask for his advice and show that you value his opinions. If you notice that you get left out of a meeting gain, bring it up in a timely manner (don’t wait for weeks!), and ask for a reason.
Although you shouldn’t expect him to respond differently to you overnight, you should start to see changes slowly. If the relationship doesn’t change and he continues to treat you in this way, set up a meeting with the Director. Do your homework before going into the meeting. Write down specific examples of how the manager treats you and the impact it has on the operations of the hospital. Then prepare what you’re going to say.
You should start to see changes.
You can say something such as, “When I suggested that we keep the hospital open an hour longer one day a week to accommodate pet owners who work during the day, he didn’t acknowledge my idea. This behavior could lead to people not offering ideas that could potentially improve the business.”
What you should avoid is going into the discussion unprepared and complaining about your manager not liking you. It’ll make you look unprofessional and petty.
If the situation doesn’t improve after talking to your manager and the director, then you’ll have to decide whether to stay and deal with it or move on.